Can I tell you something that scares me?

I’m looking back over my life when I’m 80, and I realize that I died when I was 30.

I didn’t actually die, but I may as well have. Because somewhere along the way, I lost my ambition and drive. I stopped caring about living a great life, and just sort of…became content.

I never went on that life-changing adventure around the world that I always longed for. I never found the love I’d always craved. I never started the business I’d always dreamed of.

I never allowed myself to live a meaningful life.

And I’m not happy. I’m not satisfied with my life. And all I want is a do-over.

But, the do-overs are only in the movies. I don’t get one.

So as my light goes out, as I flicker out of existence, it’s with a whimper, I go.

And there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.

What Does it Mean to Live a Meaningful Life?

Maybe the question should be: What does it mean to you to live a meaningful life?

Money? Love? Adventure?

Arguably, there’s no inherent meaning to life, which can be a scary thought.

But it can be good news, too – because then meaning can be in the eye of the beholder, and what it means to live a meaningful life is up to you.

And once you figure that out, then take the action to make it happen.

Don’t look back over your life with regret and wish you had done more with it.

Be the person who looks back over your life with delight – knowing that if you had that chance to do it all over again, you wouldn’t change a thing.

I don’t have the answer for what it means to live a meaningful life, but below (before we get into the 7 Pillars) are a few thoughts about it.

What Does it Mean to Live a Meaningful Life – The Three Components

One of the best theories I’ve come across involves psychologists Reker and Wong. In 1988, in their theory of personal meaning, they theorized that there are three components to a meaningful life.

• Having goal direction, or coherence.
• Having a sense of purpose.
• Having the sense that your life is worth living, or significance.

Together, these three components result in feelings of meaning.

What do you think? Put your thoughts below the article.

How to Live a Meaningful Life – The Four Questions to Ask Yourself

Going through life, stop to consider what you’re doing from time to time. We tend to get swept away and just go with the flow for long moments in our life. And the next thing you know, it’s been a month, a year…10 years…you get the picture.

And it takes something to jar us loose from this contentment to realize that, somehow, we haven’t been truly happy in a long time.

So here are four questions to stop and ask yourself as often as you can. Write them down. Carry them around.

Ask yourself once a week. Ask yourself when making a big decision or going through a life-changing event. Ask your significant other as you’re planning your next steps:

• Why am I doing this?
• Do I want to do this?
• What do I want to do?
• Am I enjoying life?

They sound like basic questions, but answer truthfully and your answers may surprise you.

And now onto the pillars…

The 7 Pillars of a Meaningful Life

“We create a meaningful life by what we accept as true and by what we create in the pursuit of truth, love, beauty, and adoration of nature.”
~Kilroy J. Oldster

Taking into account the three components and the questions above, as well as my own observations, I’ve come up with 7 pillars of a meaningful life.

If you take the time to ensure you have these pillars in your life, or are striving towards them, you’ll look back at your life happy and content that you, too, lived a meaningful life.

1. Have a Purpose and Follow Your Passions

I’m sure you all know someone who has no purpose – no passion.

They drift through life just going with what happens next. They don’t make big decisions and they don’t control their life. Life controls them.

They go home every night and watch Netflix, or go to the same ol’ watering hole. They stay up until 2 am playing video games, and sleep ’til noon. They float from job to job, just going with whoever will pay them more for doing the same thing.

They never strive for more. They don’t have their life’s purpose.

Everyone needs a purpose. We’ve all heard of someone that died shortly after retiring, or maybe we even know someone who did. Studies have shown that even something as simple as taking care of a plant can extend the lifespan of those living in nursing homes.

What’s important to you? What are you passionate about?

What makes you stay up into the early hours of the morning and wake up thrilled for the day?

How can you contribute in a way that you believe is meaningful?

Find your passions and you can find your purpose.

2. Essential Relationships in Your Life

There are two critical types of relationships in life.

You should strive to have a healthy balance of both.

1. Significant Relationships

In order to live a happy life, we all need significant relationships. Loved ones. A significant other. Kids. Close friends and family.

Find and nurture these relationships because they will make or break you as the years go on.

So many of us take our close relationships for granted. Instead, nurture them and continue to grow them.

2. Social Relationships

These are the relationships outside your significant relationships.

But they are essential nonetheless.

They could be people you met at work, while networking, while watching football together at Buffalo Wild Wings.

And this relationship can extend to one of the most fundamental human needs – belonging to a group, or tribe.

Don’t lose sight of these social relationships just because you have significant relationships – that’s a mistake.

You need both in your life.

3. Personal Growth

“Someone may have all the technical knowledge, scientific intellect and business know-how but when he/she decides to choose laziness, excuses, procrastination, complaining and other bad attitudes, his/her relevance is meaningless.”
~Israelmore Ayivor

It’s sad when someone reaches the pinnacle of their life at 35 and coasts until the end.

And yet, we all have friends, family, or acquaintances that do just that.

There’s a reason personal growth or personal development is such a buzzword.

Because it’s true – To have a meaningful life, it’s vital to grow and evolve continually.

And if you don’t put some emphasis on personal growth? Well, you may look back on your life one day in regret – wishing you could do it all over again.

Are you struggling with how to grow?

Ask yourself some of these questions:

• What are you passionate about?
• What do you love doing?
• What are you really good at?
• What are the things you daydream about doing but push them out of your mind to focus on “reality”?

And once you know the answers to those questions, how can you lay out a plan to involve them more in your life?

4. Make Sure You are Happy – Today

We spend a lot of our time judging our past mistakes or agonizing over our possible future mistakes.

Rarely do we stay present and just make sure we’re okay today.

Here are some ways to stay present and keep yourself happy.

• Monitor your mood – if you’re not happy, what’s bothering you? Rather than focusing on the problem, start focusing on the fix. What can you do to increase your happiness?
• Make time for the things you enjoy – the people you love, your interests and hobbies, and the things you’re passionate about.
• Take care of yourself – get enough sleep, exercise regularly, eat healthily.
• Practice mindfulness – meditate, laugh. Be grateful for the things you have instead of focusing on the things you don’t.

Start focusing on these things every day; you’ll be more present and enjoy every day a little more than you would have otherwise.

5. A Meaningful Past

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the things you did.
~Mark Twain

This is really a story of your present and your future.

But as I alluded to early on, what you do right now, in this moment, and what you do tomorrow, all play a huge part.

Many people don’t realize that you are where you are today because of your choices 3-5 years ago.

Over time, we all develop a past. One of the worst outcomes of a long life is to look back on a past we regret. A past of missed opportunities is sure to make you cringe when you look back on your life. We all want to have a great story – a good life – to share.

Even more, we all deserve to have a great story to share.

If you look at your past right now, I’m sure you have regrets, but you can’t change that. So don’t dwell.

What you can do is make sure you’re doing right now what will make you happy when you look back three years from now, five years from now, ten years from now.

Here are some questions to think about:

• What kind of story will you have?
• What stories do you have to share right now? How have you lived the last ten years?
• How will you live for the next 10?

6. Value the Right Things

I know far too many people who value material things over relationships and experiences.

And that leads to our obsession with money.

I get it; money is necessary. It makes many things in everyday life more comfortable – and I’m not saying you shouldn’t make life easier for you and your family. But to worship it like so many do is just…tragic and heartbreaking.

Gratitude for the right things is essential if you want to live a happy life of passion and purpose.

Value experiences and relationships over possessions. Visiting many other countries, one thing stands out – our society is maybe the most materialistic on this planet. We value money and wealth over nearly everything.

And here’s the kicker – our society also doesn’t rank anywhere near the top 10 in happiness.

That should be a strong clue that possessions aren’t all that meaningful.

And yet, we all want more money and more possessions: A bigger house to put more things, a bigger boat than the neighbor’s, and the best swimming pool in the town.

Instead of focusing on material things, start valuing the experiences and the relationships that can be life-changing.

• How much enjoyment have you gotten from purchasing something expensive?
• How long did that enjoyment last? Did it give your life meaning?

Ensure that you’re spending enough time on accumulating experiences and meaningful relationships. The Ferrari will mean less to you than you think in the long run.

7. Reframe Your Thoughts

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.
~Oscar Wilde

Reframing is all about seeing your past, present, and future in a different light.

It’s about focusing on what’s good rather than what’s not.

We tend to focus on the negative. We focus on what went wrong in our past (instead of what was amazing), what’s wrong with today (instead of what’s right), and what could go wrong tomorrow (instead of what could go right.)

Reframing takes some work; we are so wired to be negative by everything around us (don’t believe me? Try watching the news. Try having a conversation with a friend. We all want to discuss the negative, the tragic, i.e., what went wrong.)

And you probably do too. So whenever you catch yourself in the act, reframe that thought, and focus on something good instead.

Note: A life coach can be a great help in realizing your passion and purpose and helping you to live a life of happiness and meaning.

How to Live a Meaningful and Purposeful Life

Sure, you could continue wandering aimlessly down the path you’re going, not focusing on the things that could give your life meaning. Ensuring that regret will come back up tomorrow.

Or you could remember that who you are in 3-5 years is a direct result of the choices you make and the actions you take today.

Going with the flow one day is alright, but if you’re not careful, one day will turn into a month, then a year. And the next thing you know, you’re looking back on your life, ashamed and unhappy.

Instead, commit to yourself to live a more meaningful life, starting today.

Go through the list above, ask yourself the questions, and take action.

It’s never too late to start.

Make sure you’re not looking back in 10 years with regret that you read this article – yet did nothing…